humanity fuck you!

why do i always get hurt? this is unfair. 

am i too nice? 

am i too naive?

before, i still hope there's still humanity in this world. somehow, i'm wrong. 

i just wanna be happy. and i want everyone around me happy as well. but somehow, every time i make people around me happy, i tend to be the one getting hurt. but it's worth it right? for some people yes. for the wrong people? that made me end up on the ground picking up the broken pieces of my heart. 

i got hurt too much that i don't have a heart anymore. i want to have a heart. but i can't. 

every time i tried mending my cute little heart, i start to get hurt AGAIN. will this ever stops? 

there's nobody that i could trust anymore.

everyone's a fraud. 

everyone's fake. 

everyone's just stupid. 

due to mankind, the number of stupidity that people tend to practice in their lives are just countless. 

will i ever gain back the strength to trust anyone? 

N. 

words ii

give it time.

i will meet my right one.

ONE DAY.




N.

YOU

all i ever wanted was

a shoulder to cry on.
ears to listen.
eyes to understand.
heart to love and care.


and accept ME the most. no matter in what situation i got myself in. no matter how fucked up i can be.


someone that will stay there by me, supporting me, care for me, even how fucked up i am.


he will stay. and still make me fall.



EVERYDAY.



N.

words

feelings.
leave my body.
dont ever come back.
leave me heartless.
leave me to be the most hated.

heart.
i'll keep you away from this world.
it's too bullshit to risk you.
from getting broken again.
i'll hide you.
somewhere that even i cant find you.

emotions.
disappear from my sight.
dont ever try to give me back the light.
let me stay in this darkness.
in this pitch black hole.



this is where i belong.



N.