im glad i got to know you guys :)

hello yolo!

i just wanted to write this entry to express my gratitude that i got the chance to get to know these 2 people. they showed me that nothing is impossible and everything is possible if you believe. am i right? or am i right?

i got to know this guy i call him teddy bear okay? so i got to know teddy from.... i have absolutely no idea! hahaha prolly facebook maybe. yeah... we never met before but we have mutual friends i guess? so we became friends and he was really really nice. i think he's the most adorable teddy i've ever met and a really good listener. and he loves to make jokes too! well, i started to like him a bit but i just keep it to myself until one day he confessed that he likes me. and im like yey! (coz i kinda like him too) hahaha. so basically we became the bestest of friends ever and talking to him every night helps me a lot in not being that stressful through out my school days.

but then...

i got to know something. that his best friend stills loves him so much (eventhough according to him they broke up already). okay... *awkward* but then i heard rumours going around saying i took him away from her. and im like errr? i dont even know you. and your so-called 'boyfriend' has never mention of you. EVER. he approached me first. we became friends. and tadaaa we like each other. but then, i realised something. he actually loves her too. STILL loves her too. and that makes me wonder, then what am i doing here? why am i standing in the middle of them? and i knew i have to back down. he begged me not to leave and said that he loves me instead of her but i know, i know that he loves her more than me. how can he loves me more since we've never met? he doesnt even know me.

as soon as i lost contact with teddy. i got to know that teddy and his best friend were together again.

you see, it hurts me a lot that i am a rebound. just someone to replace the ones somebody has lost. but it's not nice you know. admitting that you love me just because you want me to be with you. you guys taught me a lot. that even anything that might happen, if you're meant for each other, you will eventually be together. i'm happy for you guys, seriously :)

p.s. presently, not all 'i love you' means the true love. sometimes people just use it because they wanna prove something. love cannot be proven through words, but through actions. and i felt that once. yet i lost it. but i hope i can find it again. one day.

xoxo,
n.